Under the Quilt

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Sunday, June 25, 2006

Dry Humping a Metal Chair (I know you cannot help yourself.....you MUST read on)

I promise I really am going to post about the hall of fame. But first I just wanted to let y'all know that if the Sandman ever comes to your town, whatever you do, DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES go see this man!!!!!

Who's the Sandman you say? Some old creepy(I'll explain that part in a minute) guy that calls himself a hypnotist comedian. Friday was our last night before the kids came home from camp, so we decided to go see a comedy show. We found a local place on the net and googled the guy that they had listed for their 8:00pm show. We found a few video clips of portions of his act. He seemed pretty funny so we said, "What the heck". Reservations made. Payed ahead to make sure we'd have seats. Get there and the place is filled with smoke (pet peeve of mine I always feel ill when around smoke for any amount of time). Just before the show is supposed to start, we spot this 50-60 ish guy next to the stage groping one of the waitresses and grinning from ear to ear (kinda like The Joker...now that IS creepy). The waitress was distracted by taking someone's order. I'm not sure if she was trying to ignore the guy so he would leave her alone or if she truly was concentrating on her job and didn't really notice. Either way, it was VERY inappropriate. He was basically fondling her from head to toe and by the look on his face thought he a stud. I felt like throwing up. And going up and smacking him back into reality. Do men still think this is actually ok? When I say "men" I mean some men because I know that all men do not think this way (at least I hope not....God maybe they do and I'm just kidding myself).

Next thing I know this fondling man gets on stage with a microphone. I'm thinking, "Please just announce the comedian and get off the stage so we can get on with the show" (Remember....I checked the net and saw pictures of the REAL comedian that was performing so I knew that this was not the guy). Have you figured it out yet?

This groper guy is supposed to entertain us for the next 2 hours. Yay! (Boo...hiss) At least he stuck with his theme for the night......sexual innuendo. Not that I don't enjoy that......just not from creepy groper guy who reminds me of my uncle who is a pedofile and is into incest (yeah, I actually have one of those). So the next time I decide to be entertain and want to laugh my butt off, I will call the club and ask them specifically these questions:

1. Is the Sandman performing tonight?

2. If the performer that you have scheduled to perform does not show, will the Sandman be the backup?

3. Do you allow smoking in your club? (I know I'm a prude, but I also like to breath and not feel like I'm going to puke)

4. Is the Sandman performing tonight?

Did I mention the part of the show where one of the volunteers on stage (supposedly under hynosis at this point) is dry humping on the metal folding chair? Picture this if you will......50ish guy with a rather large gut....mouth open.... toungue hanging out.....hubby leans over to me and says, "This is wrong on so many levels". Ummmm yeah, you think?

5 Comments:

  • At 10:06 AM , Blogger jef said...

    it's really hard to earn money, that I gotta say!

     
  • At 10:24 AM , Blogger mtcutie said...

    ewww!
    I feel like i need a shower just reading about that creep!

     
  • At 12:10 PM , Blogger Bearette24 said...

    that is so gross. ugh! i bet he is the "x-rated hypnotist"; i've heard of that guy.

     
  • At 12:29 PM , Blogger His suzy said...

    I know some hypnotists are fun, but that's just gross.

     
  • At 2:26 PM , Blogger Liz said...

    I've seen a couple of hypnotists in comedy clubs before, but they were very professional. Once I thought I was getting hypnotized at my table, but it turned out that I was just drunk. Heh.

     

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