Don't be messin' round on me

You know how sometimes you wake up from a dream that's so real, so gut wrenchingly real, that you HAVE TO seek out the person that did you so very, very wrong in that dream? And then if that evil person that did you wrong is lying right next to you when you wake up it's so very, very hard to not reach out and punch them smack in the face?

Don't worry, I restrained myself. But I still have not shaken the feeling that I had when I woke up. It's one that is still resting in my gut. Yes, it was just a dream. But the contents of the dream are something that happens to couples all too often. They are the types of things that split marriages and break off engagements. What am I talking about? You guessed it. Cheating. Messing around. Fillandering.

It is the one thing that I don't think I would ever be able to forgive. I say "don't think" because I've never been put in that position and no one ever really knows how they'll react to a situation until they are actually presented with one. I said so much in my dream. I said a lot of things in my dream in between taking extremely deep, long breaths so as not to pass out and continually having to remind my husband that I DID NOT HAVE THE CAPACITY TO ALLOW HIM TO TOUCH ME WHILE HE GROVELLED. He couldn't quite understand how I didn't want to cuddle up while we discussed the fact that he just showed up at our house with two other women to have a threesome. Oh boy, the look on his face when he opened the door and there I was. Hi honey. What's this? I knew right away when his expression turned from boyish and gleefilled to oh my god my wife just caught me and either my life is literally over (because she's going to grab a knife and take me out this minute) or she's going to rake me over the coals before sending me on my way. Either that, or she pretends to forgive me and spends the rest of our years together making me feel like a piece of dirt for all the crap that I've put her through.

Anyhoo.....

Amongst the questions that I had for him:

Is this the first time this has happened? No

Are these the only two wenches you've been with? No, there was a third, but she's no longer in the picture. (yippee...not)

Do you realize that I might possibly never be able to get over this and what that implies? [stunned silence] (I wasn't expecting an answer so that's fine)

Um, do I need to worry about dying from HIV/AIDS or getting some other non-deadly but equally non-friendly disease? (I never got an answer to this one because I woke up)